eXamine Your Zipper and other embarrassing moments

It was in middle school. PE. Gym class.  Uh....let's just end it there shall we?

The point is, we're all human. *pinches arm, takes blood test...yup, definitely human* We all make mistakes. And of course some of them aren't really our fault. The ones that are? Own them and move on.

Life's a learning curve.

As writers we face an ever bigger curve than most. Why? Because we're living so many lives simultaneously. There's this character, and this one, and then oh! this poor misunderstood villain over here!!  With all those lives to figure out, it's bound to happen that we forget who we are. And embarrass ourselves.

Like maybe by sending a query letter addressed to the wrong person. Or attaching the wrong manuscript to a requested full.  Not that I've had these things happen to me. I'm still gearing myself up for querying, remember?  But I've known other writers who have faced these...trials. :)

And because of their honesty I might avoid them myself. A quick check on a name. A double check on the MS.  Writers are so good to each other. We're not in competition with each other for the number of sit ups we can do in PE class. I mean...uh...writers care about helping one another out. We give each other tips, reviews, and blurbs on books. We WANT readers to explore other authors' books.

It's not middle school. We can handle a little competition.

So what is the most embarrassing thing a writer can do? Has anything embarrassing ever happened to you? Any words of wisdom to impart to us?

Underestimating our Value and Worth

We are our worst critics.

You've no doubt heard this phrase before. Along with:

• There's nothing to fear but fear itself.
• You've only failed once you've stopped trying.
• Doubt has killed more dreams than actual rejection.

There are so many out there. Proof that we can be our worst enemies when it comes to fulfilling our dreams. It isn't the agent who rejected us, but the fact that we only sent out 1000 queries. What about the 1001th?!  That could have been the one!

I've already talked about the fear of rejection here this month. Underestimating ourselves goes much deeper though. Not valuing what our story is worth, the lives it can change, or simply the good laugh it can be. Underestimating ourselves will cut us off from our dreams more effectively than any agent, publisher or well-meaning friend.

I let someone scare me into studying something else right out of high school. I didn't think my writing was worth enough to support myself with. Money is such an evil word. As though that's the only reason that people write. As though only things of value have a price tag on them. As if.

Write your story. Share it with others. Don't let anyone tell you that your time is misspent.  Don't believe me? Here's a little motivation. :)

Think Tank

*glug...glug..blurp*

No, not that kind of tank. A "think" tank. Where all the ideas of many are all pooled together to create mass awesomeness and wonder!!!

And did you know that  the think tank has an actual presence online?  It's true. I swear. I'm part of the Facebook group, Authors' Think Tank. The website is ForeverWriters.com. And recently they started a podcast series.  People!  THE THINK TANK IS REAL!! And they have a theme song, so you know...they pretty much rock.

Facebook: Click here

Website: Click here

Podcasts: Click here

You're welcome. :)

Social Media and Sushi

Not long ago my husband took me to a sushi grill.  It's one of the many ways he says, "I love you!" Honestly, any dinner I don't have to cook is an "I love you," but sushi has an exclamation mark attached to it.  Just sayin'.

So this one night we're seated at the grill next to a man and two children. They're busying themselves on their phones and iPads. A standard thing when you're killing time.

And then the chef came out. And the electronics...stayed on. While this fellow flipped and sizzled and entertained all of us, the three to our left were entertaining themselves.  I was a little aghast. Who goes to a sushi grill and ignores the show?  Apparently these three.

What the chef did next had my husband and I laughing the rest of the night. He slapped his spatula down to get their attention and then said, "You like your toys more than my show?" Mortified, the girls turned off their devices. The man resisted a little longer, probably out of spite.

I nudged my husband under the table and we shared a smile, proud of the chef for calling them out.  They were being rude, in our opinion. Sushi grills are for socializing. And these guys were missing out on the very best kind.  Life has so much to offer than just what people tweet or blog. Experiencing things for yourself will IMPACT you differently.

With all the wonderful things we can share with one another, don't live vicariously through someone else. That will leave you little satisfaction in the end. Live...and then live to tweet another day.

Do you have trouble putting your electronics down? What's the number one reason you check social media?

Rejection

I'm a day late (and very late at that) in posting because I was at the TeenBookCon yesterday. It was fabulous. I took my daughter. We fan-girled all day. And took pictures. Totally awesome.

We listened to authors tell us their publishing stories; all the times they've failed and succeeded, even after publishing multiple books.  Each one is hard, they said. There's no guarantee, just because you've been published before.

Rejection, or the fear thereof, is one of the hardest things a writer will face. Well, after writing the actual book that is. WHY WON'T THIS THING JUST WRITE ITSELF. :) The fear that someone won't like our work sometimes keeps us from ever sending it out. But you'll never know if someone will like it or not, unless you TRY.

To date I've sent out one query. One. I got a rejection the following day.

I had to laugh. Mostly out of relief because the torture had been quickly. No drawn out agony for weeks and weeks.  One day. One look. Nope, not for her. No problem, I said. In fact, I had only sent it out because my husband asked me to. Practically insisted.  He could see that I was being held back by fear, and he wanted me to get past that hurdle as quickly as possible.  I didn't feel ready. And that the work wasn't ready.  But he knew me well enough to know that that feeling would never change.  I would always fear that it wasn't ready. I wanted it to be perfect before sending it out. As if. Pfst!

I've learned a few things since that first and only query and soon I'll be ready to do battle again. The book is stronger. I'm stronger. And I know that what I want is to find it the right home. I'm not going to worry about whether or not someone doesn't like it or why. I'm willing to find the right person who will love it as much as I do. It deserves nothing less.  I deserve nothing less.

How do you view rejections in the publishing world? What are your worst fears when it comes to publishing?