Of course, I'm all things wrapped into one...and sometimes I just have to take turns at which one I focus on. It's been a struggle...especially seeing as how motherhood always takes a front row seat. Yes, my husband is a huge help in being the other parental authority and my kids are a big support when it comes to the house (especially since they're the ones messing it up). And yes, my blog's a little wanting, though you have to admit the book trailers rock! :)
But I keep reminding myself that it's all worth it. That juggling multiple roles in life is real. It's the stuff books are made of. Conflict. Characters. Resolution. I AM my own novel in action...and by golly it's going to have a happy ending! even though right now I'm in the conflict stage.
It was during a particularly down moment yesterday that I found myself on Twitter. Folks, that place can be a time stealer, but it can also be a place for support...relief...answers. A simple tweet among hundreds popped up while I was on, and I found my way to the blog Women on Writing. (Thank you Elizabeth for getting me there!)
The topic was geared to writers, but for me it was so much more. I saw what the author was saying and realized that it also applied to my life as a Mom, student and wife...not just as a writer. And I found new hope. "Make a list," she said. A pros and cons list. All the reasons for doing something, and then all the reasons to give it up. Wow. I mean, you wouldn't think a list like that could help, but I'm here to tell you it did. Just THINKING about making a list was enough to remind me of who I am. What I was doing. And that it would ALL be worth it in the end. ALL of it. So what that I'm busy. I'm doing things that will bring me immense joy in the end. And possibly others.
In fact, I had someone in class the other day tell me that they appreciated one of my poems because they truly felt my grief and she could understand what I was going through (in the poem). I spent last night cuddled up next to my husband and children during a movie, and it didn't matter at all that I had homework to do. Today I'll be studying hard, but the house is already clean so there's actually time. Really. There's time for it all, folks. Maybe not all at once, and maybe it means being patient with all my writing goals, but it's worth it. WORTH IT!
Do you feel it? Do you know it for yourself? I challenge you to find out and see what a difference it makes in your life. In your writing. And who knows...maybe what you learn will be shared on Twitter one day and change someone else's life. You never know.
That is, unless you dair to find out. :) Good luck!